CNN Friends

In the month and a half I've been living in Hungary, I have come to know the news anchors on CNN quite well, as they are the only constant, reliable English voices at my disposal. I like to think of them as friends... Sad? Yes. Educational? Yes! I am more informed about world news right now than I have ever been. I know so much about the Chilean miners, the million French people on strike after the government's plan to raise the retirement age, and closer to my new home, the toxic sludge spill in Hungary. I realize I probably should have addressed this issue a week ago when the initial spill happened, before I was bombarded with questions about if I have been swallowed by the toxic waste, but I am a master procrastinator, so I'm doing it now.

I am in no immediate danger of the toxic sludge as it is about 300 km (185 miles) Northwest of me, but I will most definitely refrain from ordering fish when I'm out to eat for quite a while. In the middle of such a tragic accident, (about a million cubic meters of red toxic sludge has taken 9 lives, wiped out many homes, and forced hundreds of families to relocate because of the high toxicity levels that have seeped into and destroyed their homes) Leave it to me, the eternal optimist, find one small humorous aspect in the situation.

To start, Hungarian is by no means an easy language to tackle. Every once in a while I allow my students try to teach me a word or two, and they end up with aching cheeks from laughing at my honest, but pitiful attempts to pronounce even the most simple of words. I've only just begun to absorb a very small amount of it, and I usually end up mixing up the words and telling my waitress "I love you a small pizza" instead of "I would like a small pizza." I have noticed that my friends at CNN also find Hungarian a difficult language to manage, because they absolutely butcher the names of the towns, and have completely omitted one in particular from their broadcasts.

The three towns that were flooded in the toxic spill are called Kolontár, Devecser and Somlóvásárhely. Most of my CNN friends at least attempt to say the names of the first two towns, usually butchering them in the process, but it's the effort that counts. Right? Right. Nobody ever even tries to pronounce Somlóvásárhely though. I feel bad for the people of Somlóvásárhely, nobody outside Hungary will ever know, or even recognize this town simply because nobody ever even attempts to say it. They may as well officially change their name to "Thethirdtownaffectedbythetoxicsludgespill," because that is how it will forever be known. It's longer, but this way CNN will be able to correctly identify them, and keep ALL the people affected in the history books.

Another slightly humorous observation I've made in the time I've been getting to know Hala Gorani, Richard Quest, and Becky Anderson, is the way in which they are able to label people. For example, I've had CNN on tv long enough for Chilean miners #12-24 to be rescued, and they haven't skipped a beat in giving each and every one of them a Spice Girl-esque persona, and oddly there has been at least one miner equivalent to each one of the Spice Girls. Scary, Baby, Ginger, Posh, and Sporty Spice. For example, Scary 'Miner' is the 63 year old one missing 3 fingers. Baby 'Miner' is the youngest (18 years old) for obvious reasons. Ginger 'Miner' is the second miner rescued with the fiery sense of humor who brought rocks as gifts to the Chilean president. Posh 'Miner' is the one who was fashion conscious and didn't wear the obviously homemade t-shirt and rocked his NASA jumpsuit by itself. Sporty 'Miner' is the one who jogged up and down the mining tunnels every day to keep busy and fit.

In no way do I mean to de-humanize these men by comparing them to the ever impressive Spice Girls, but I am merely pointing out the fact that my news anchor friends have turned them, as well as their families into characters on a tv show, or a 90s pop girls singing sensation, who will now be expected to live up to these names. I doubt there will be an enormous demand from preteen girls for 33 different collectors barbie dolls modeled after the miners anytime soon, but I won't be surprised if books titled, "Elvis Lived Underground for 70 Days," or "Lucky Miner #13," are released in the next month or so. It solidifies how the media creates identities that these people must now live up to, or they will fall out of the spotlight because the general public don't like the actual people, just their 'reality tv personas' created by the media.

That's not very nice CNN. I need new friends.